How I got a flake to buy me lunch

Txt game can be really deep. Here's how I turned a flake into buying me lunchwith a little bit of finesse. Mostly I just held my value, had standards, minifreezeouts, did a little invalidation/DQ. That's all it takes… validation is oneof the PRIMARY motivators for womens' behaviors.

Background: We had set up a lunch date since she works in the area but lives toofar for my tastes. Obviously I know no escalation will happen at lunch but Iknew it'd be an easy way to ramp up comfort so I could throw the hoop out therefor her to roll down to my place in the evening some time. She showed high interest but flaked on me 3 times. Once or twice I can understand but the 3rdtime I lost interest. I'm a busy man and my time is valuable. The last thing Ireceived from her was:

HBFlake: "Hey something came up I can't make today, I'll call you"

She never called, so I lost her number. Two weeks passed…

I received a text from an unknown # telling me she was "sick". I knew it was her from clues in the msg. It seems innocuous and a"Get better soon" might have seemed the socially appropriate reply, but I saw it for what it was: Validation seeking on her part. She knew she fucked up and wanted to know if I would still put in an effort or respond to her. No, I won't. Not replying as a PUSH was the correct decision. Another week passed and I received this text from an unknown number:

HBunknown: "Hi How are you?"

I decided to go for another big PUSH. This person wasn't in contact enough to besaved in my phone. I figured they would get pissed at the question and eithernot txt back or it would hook.

MM: "Who is this?"
HBFlake: "HBFlake"
MM: "It's so awesome outside, I just got back from surfing Del Mar"

I intentionally left this out there with no rapport building, not asking her how she's been or anything. She could have stopped replying because I gave her nothing to work with. All part of the plan so she starts trying to win me over.

HBFlake: "Awesome I am out swimming and sunning myself in Oceanside, dogsitting"

She continued the conversation – rapport seeking on a woman is one of thelargest IOIs.

MM: "Sounds fun, but Oceanside? You're so far, you'll have to find yourself downhere more often"

Kind of a half disqualification of her on my part. I really don't have time toput up with LD chicks, especially if they are gonna flake.

HBFlake: "Yeah I know…. So lunch next week?"

MM: "Well we've tried 3 times, I think you owe me lunch now mrs cornflake (:"

First of all, it's important not to sound like you're butthurt over anything she's done because reactivity conveys neediness. At the same time you need to convey you are a man of STANDARDS and draw boundaries for her. Girls like a guy with a backbone. Balancing between the two can be really tricky as I found outlast night.

So I threw this out there, along with a hoop. I'm not going to be easy for her at this point after all these flakes. She's gonna have to earn me back. I'm pushing her pretty hard here, and it's completely intentional. The solution forher flaking is for her to chase and then earn me.

HBFlake: "Sure my treat, how about (venue) on (weekday).. though I'm more of aCheerio"

Some more junk after that but basically I turned this flake into chasing me andwanting to buy me lunch. The professional girl from a few wks back flaked on ourfollowup afternoon date and feels bad so she's buying me a sushi dinner.

To quote a song in my favorite movie: "Damn, it feels good to be a gangsta". Now, where's that Fax Machine? PC Load Letter... what the fuck is that?!

-MM